American Idol: Greensboro Auditions

I am taking the Mac route tonight ... Since Fox insists on making me sit through so many auditions, I am just hitting the high notes.

• The show rarely kicks off with someone worthwhile. If you are looking for real "American Idols," you still have time to grab a snack during the first 10 minutes of the show.

• Jerry Springer jokes still work. Unfortunately, potential Jerry panelists do not.

• If you get an extended profile, you are more likely getting a ticket to Hollywood.

• Randy's shirt was a little too pitchy for me.

• There was certainly more than one dummy on tonight's episode -- and I'm not talking about the guy with the puppet.

• Do you think Simon has any respect for Paula as a singer? Either way, I'm sure he wouldn’t be alone.

• Paula is immune to no man -- especially if he can actually sing.

• Is the theme to the TV show "A Different World" an actual song?

• Fellas: Stay off the Whitney. And while you're at it, scratch Mariah, Celine and Cher off your lists too.

• I don't care what anyone says: The 17-year-old with the squeaky speaking voice is the next "American Idol." If not, you can at least expect a record contract. Wow.

• A tube top does not make you a star (not even a porn star), even if it is sparkly. Apparently though, it sometimes makes you a delusional psycho.

On a final note, I understand that it's a ratings juggernaut, but one hour of auditions works well. Two hours tries my patience a bit. -- Rachel Cericola

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Mac's Rambling Thoughts from This Episode

• I begin with the single greatest quote in "American Idol" history: "Paula Abdul ain't got shit on me!" -- Rhonetta Johnson

• Her dad is in prison. Her mom left her when she was two. She's a waitress at one of those roller-skating drive-in places. She's cute as hell and sweeter than a bowl of sugar. Ladies and gentlemen, I present the next American Idol ... Kellie Pickler. "Pick Pickler!"

• But not so fast Pickler fans! Paris Bennett whipped out one of the greatest auditions ever. EVER. I got chills, and I don't chill easily. In fact, I've only experienced three "AI" chills in all the years I've watched this show. Because I know you're all very interested in this kind of thing, my three chill moments are: 1. Kelly Clarkson's rendition of "Natural Woman; 2. Paris Bennett's audition; and 3. The single best "AI" performance ever: Tamyra Gray, "A House is Not a Home."

By the way, Tamyra was robbed.

• I'm 100% sure the Fox lawyers broke into hives when Steven David Jr. serenaded Paula with "Let's Get It On." Have we learned nothing from Corey Clark?

• If your Mom says you sound like "Carrie Underwood crossed with Britney Spears," she's lying. Your Mom just lied to you.

• Lisa Bonet be damned: "A Different World" is an awesome song.

• Just once, I want the "American Idol" producers to do one of those teary-eyed profiles for a contestant who absolutely sucks.

• This year's Scott Savol: Chase Bush. How did that voice come out of that guy?

• Vibrato -- (noun) -- That annoying rapid shaky thing you often hear in crappy singers' voices.


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American Idol - Gay or GLADD?

GLAAD concerned about gays on American Idol
You've probably read somewhere that Gay and Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation (GLAAD) has called American Idol "increasingly homophobic." The controversy starts with episode one, where Charles Berry was denied entry into the competition. He had auditioned before and each time was denied, but given advice. He claimed to have followed all of their advice. This time Simon Cowell told him to shave his beard and wear a dress.

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Then the next episode, we met Zachary Travis. Wearing high heals, a girly shirt, and a girl's haircut. He came in speaking like a girl, talking about how people keep asking him if he's a girl. So of course Randy Jackson bit, asking him if he was a girl. Duh, what do you expect people to do if you confuse them like that. Anyhow, he was turned down because he couldn't sing.

So now we're at the point where GLAAD gets involved. According to the GLAAD website, they have only ever made three comments about the issue. First up:
All fair and good, after all, AI has never been overly gay-friendly. Simon has poked fun at male contestants who weren't manly enough (for example the runner-up in Season Two whose name I am loath to mention as it will bring his rabid fans down upon me). Simon and host Ryan Seacrest trade jabs with each other, each either calling the other gay or implying it. So yeah, go ahead and talk to the producers about the show being more gay-friendly. I personally don't think it will work, but if it makes you feel better, why not?

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'Idol' Judges' Comments Stir Response From GLAAD

NEW YORK, Jan. 23 -- Fox's "American Idol" drew an objection from the Gay & Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation (GLAAD) after judges Simon Cowell and Randy Jackson made what the gay rights group deemed questionable comments on last week's season premiere episode.

On last Tuesday's show, seen by a Nielsen-chart-topping 35.5 million viewers, Cowell told one male contestant to "wear a dress" and Jackson asked another, "Are you a girl?"

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Damon Romine, a spokesman for GLAAD, said in a statement posted on the group's Web site that "the real offense here was in the producer's decision to add insult to injury by turning a contestant's gender expression into the butt of a joke."

On Monday Romine updated the situation with another statement: "We've spoken with Fox and have entered into what we hope will be a productive, ongoing conversation about the show's representation and discussion of sexual orientation and gender expression."

A spokesman for "American Idol" said Monday that Fox had no comment.

The popular Fox show, now in its fifth season, airs Tuesdays at 8 p.m.





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